Tricking Astrid (ch 20)

Calder found out Remy and Astrid were seeing each other again from the private detective he hired. Calder had a lot of useful information about Remy, but he'd shoved the envelope inside of his desk after its contents had made him see red and break out in a sweat.

Astrid's phone calls tore him up. When letting it ring, he knew he was hurting her, but it was for his own sake. After hearing they were back together after a mere seven days, he felt justified in his decision.

He sulked at home alone every night after work, haunted by Astrid. He thought of her constantly. Why? Why, when he could go see other women?

Why?

Astrid may have been asking herself the same question because she showed up at his place three nights later. He was drinking and when she asked to be allowed up, he was a jerk.

"What for?" He spoke into the speaker, holding a glass of bourbon.

"I want to see you. Calder, I didn't come all the way here to talk through a mic. Buzz me in."

"What for?" he repeated, knowing she was pissed.

"Do you want me to go?" Her voice sounded the opposite of angry, tired and sad.

Frowning, he buzzed her inside. Looking down at his briefs he decided she'd already seen him naked and could deal with it again. Drunk, he stumbled to open the door then walked over to the bar to refill his glass.

Astrid came in, rolling her eyes when she saw him. She looked incredibly hot in white low rise jeans and a tight red shirt. She tossed her purse on the sofa then joined him for a drink.

"Nice underwear," she grinned, "Why didn't you answer my calls? What happened?"

Leaning towards her he said, "You happened. You'll keep seeing Remy so I stepped back."

She sighed, smelling his liquored breath, "You said you were my friend."

"I lied," he snapped, "I can't just be friends with you, Astrid. Look at you!" he slapped her ass unexpectedly, and she stood still with an amused expression, "I want to fuck the shit out of you right now. Is that the kind of friend you want?"

"No," she cocked her head, "So you decided that you'd step back? Is that what you said?"

"Yup!" He found his way to the sofa before collapsing, "I have decided to let you go and move on to women who want me."

"Calder!" she sat down next to him, "I want you! If anything, I was beginning to want you more than any man I've ever known."

"Then why are you with Remy?" he spat, "You ran back to him!"

"I didn't do that!" she yelled, "He and I ran into each other and you ignored me! You still are! I came here... because..."

"Why?" he angrily shouted in her face, "Because he hurt you? Canceled a date? Couldn't get it up? Because you had to know why I won't call you back? All I do is think about calling you."

She swallowed, "Calder, I want you."

He waved his hand towards the door, "Go away."

"Calder," she looked like she would cry and he didn't want to watch, "I... want only you. He's not who I want to be with. His life is twisted, angry and he'll hurt me I stay. Physically harm me in a way no will care about."

"I should care?" he sneered, "You chose Remy, Astrid. You like it."

She stood up, full of fury, "No one gives a shit about me. I'm all alone. I hope you realize when I leave he'll win. He'll get me when you know you are the one I should be with. I can't tell you the courage it took for me to come here."

Astrid picked up her purse, storming towards the door. Calder was going to let her leave except her words held so much truth he couldn't. He wasn't that much of an asshole who didn't realize she was in need and had come to him for help.

"Astrid," he lurched unsteadily to his feet, "Stop right there."

She swiveled on her heels, tears slowly rolling down to her flushed cheeks. "You are wasted! Why are you sitting home alone, in your skivvies, drunk off of your ass?"

"Because all I can think about other than you is my job," he ranted, walking over to her, "You tell me he'll hurt you that no one cares about you then leave? What kind of head games are you playing Astrid?"

She looked insulted, "Head games? Do you want to talk about head games? What about when you told me all that shit about friendship, respect, and compassion only to walk out on me? Do you think I simply shrugged and said, 'Oh, he's just showing me so much understanding I must send him a thank you card'?"

He laughed at her sarcasm, "I left because you'll never choose me. Girls like you love men like Remy. I'm not who you want. I saved us both a lot of trouble by leaving you alone. Don't come here expecting me to save you from your own damn decisions."

"I'm not!" Once more she became teary-eyed, "Calder, you are who I choose. If you honestly don't want me, I will leave right now and never bother you again."

She closed her mouth although it trembled. Calder wanted Astrid. He'd thought about Pros and Cons a lot. The fucked up part was, she already had him even if he hated Remy. If he told her what the decision to have her in his life meant, he'd never be able to let her go again.

"What about Remy?" He softened his tone so she'd calm down, "Tell me where you two stand. Does he know you've decided to be with me?"

"No," she gulped back tears, "I was sitting at home, waiting for him to come over. He was at a woman's house, doing lord knows what to her, when I realized I couldn't take it anymore. He was gentle the first day, the next a little rougher, then last night he did this."

With scared, hesitant eyes she lifted her shirt, revealing bruised skin over her ribs in three places. Remy had either hit or kicked her and his blood pressure rose instantly.

"Astrid," he whispered as she avoided his eyes, quickly tugging the shirt down, "Why? Why would Remy hurt you if he loves you? Love's not harming someone like that."

She went over to the bar, "You know, I realized that a long time ago, but when he's fucking me it slips my mind. He called me when I was in the cab coming here."

Calder sat on the sofa, sobering up from arguing and the shock of seeing Astrid's bruised body. Remy would never see her again. He would make sure Astrid remained near until sure Remy had moved on. He was done denying his feelings.

"I love you, Astrid," he boldly stated.

She half turned, a bottle of vodka in one hand, "Why would you say that? You can't really love me."

He snorted, embarrassed, "Yeah, because you don't love me back?"

She set the bottle down and came over. The mixed emotions on her face were wary. Calder held his arms open, and she stepped close enough for him to pull her across his lap. She smiled softly, touching his stubbled cheek.

"I could love you," she whispered, "I thought I did when you disappeared. I know nothing about love. Hard love, yes. Remy is easier to accept because I know his type. If I can survive it that's a whole other matter."

Calder exhaled, "You will be with me. ONLY me from now on. Don't talk to Remy. Don't even feel sorry for the bastard. If you came here to have our own relationship, you will get Remy out of your life. I'm not playing around. If he threatens us, I'll handle it."

Astrid hugged Calder, and he held her, careful of her side. Her body trembled, making him wonder what else Remy had done to her that she wasn't ready to say yet. It didn't matter because she agreed to his terms and sat on his lap until falling asleep. The poor girl was exhausted. He had thought she was wearing dark makeup again, but she had deep, dark circles under her eyes.

He carried her to his bed without waking her and laid down beside her, feeling as if he had done this to her. If he wouldn't have left that night, would she have gone back to Remy? He clenched his jaw, holding back a curse at the fact Remy had beaten her. Sexual or not, those bruises were meant to harm, not inflict joy. To hurt her for things REMY saw wrong with her.

If only he had the envelope to show Astrid who exactly Remy was. Calder knew there was a vicious fight on the way. Astrid had picked the right man, only the wrong one had picked her.

Remy.

"I do love you," he softly whispered to her sleeping figure in the dark, then fell asleep holding her hand.

*Before Astrid left Remy for Calder*

"Remy! No, I don't want to!"

Astrid's pleas fell on deaf ears as Jay and Remy held her down with rough hands. Remy had slipped a drug into her beer, she knew he had to of because the sensations coursing through her were unnatural and foreign.

Remy covered her mouth so Jay wouldn't have to hear her crying, asking them to stop. Astrid struggled, but his hold was firm as Jay pumped into her from behind. Her body stung as their fingers dug into her flesh.

She closed her eyes tightly, salty tears wiggling out as she felt utterly violated.

Raped.

Remy promised her he would never hurt her again! That he would treat her better! Yet, here they were holding her down so Jay could get his rocks off. Remy had tricked her into the same situation as before. She had been having a good time until suddenly finding herself kissed, caressed and pinned down.

She felt herself float away.

The drug made it easy.

Remy touched her.

Jay fucked her.

When she stopped fighting, they didn't notice. The bedroom faded away as the hours past and when someone slapped her hard, her mind snapped back to where she was.

"Get up," Remy grinned as he stood over her, "Let's take a shower, baby."

"What happened?" Astrid moaned, flinching when she moved and her body flared in pain.

Remy laughed, yanking her into a sitting position by her forearms, "You don't remember? You look so cute right now, all sleepy eyed. Wake up, baby. I have a long day planned for us. It's my last day off."

Astrid groaned as he tugged until she stood on wobbly legs, "What time is it? What happened? All I remember is-"

"It's over," Remy cut in, "Come on, I'll shower with you."

Astrid felt disoriented until the semi-warm water startled her into awareness. The ache and pains grew the more she moved but when the water warmed some of it melted away. Remy massaged her back tenderly as she gingerly soaped her front.

Her memory was foggy, yet she remembered Jay. Recalled his body sliding along hers although she said no. She closed her eyes, fighting back tears. Remy worked the muscles on her back like a professional until she relaxed.

"I love you," he sighed happily, turning her around, "You'll never walk out on me again? Right?"

Astrid didn't look up, focusing on his erection and how the overhead spray fell onto it. She wasn't aroused in the least. That shocked her. Remy had always appealed to her even if she wasn't in the mood. Something was changing, and it wasn't good. Remy was breaking her. Was he intentionally pushing her to the limit so she wouldn't fight him?

"I asked if you loved me?" Remy pinched her chin in his fingers, jerking her head up, "You'll never leave me? I know we belong to one another. You are the girl I've been waiting for."

She looked into his hardened hazel eyes, hearing him speak kind and meaningful but seeing none of it on his handsome face, "Yeah."

He kissed her on the mouth hard, "Wash your hair. I will dry off then get your clothes."

Astrid was glad when Remy let her finish showering alone. Her hands trembled as she reached for the two-in-one shampoo. Damn, her entire body hurt.

Remy didn't leave her alone for long. In two days he'd barely left her side for more than a few minutes. Even when she'd used the toilet! Nor had she been able to sleep. He had kept her moving, always planning things for them to do. She was beyond exhausted.

Remy had her dress, then ushered her out to sit on the sofa. Astrid took aspirin with a beer he handed her. When he went into the kitchen Arlo came out of his room. He avoided eye contact as he walked over to a side table to gather up his keys.

"Arlo," she whispered, fearing Remy would be mad to find them talking, "Look at me."

Arlo jerked his head up, but looked toward the kitchen, "I'll see you guys later."

"Hey," she stood, her limbs protesting, "What happened last night? I- I'm a little fuzzy on the details."

Arlo finally looked at her and it was with sympathy. Astrid didn't remember seeing Arlo last night when Remy brought her over. He had seemed eager to have an orgy the last time she had seen him, but the look she was receiving now made her think it had been more complicated than that.

"Astrid, you remember enough to know you'll have to keep doing what Remy tells you to do," Arlo loud-whispered, "I'm sorry. I have to go."

Astrid sat back down as Arlo quickly left the apartment. She felt Arlo had given her a warning. A warning that made her feel sick.

Alone.

Remy came back into the room smiling, "Okay! Let's go eat then I'll take you shopping. I've been wanting to buy you something nice for a while. Come on, baby!"

Astrid gave a smile so he'd be gentle and not pull on her like an impatient child. The exhaustion she fought was nothing compared to the anxiety. She didn't want to be with Remy any longer. Every time he touched her, she wanted to flinch, although she held herself composed and stoic.

Astrid played along the entire day. They ate, went to an expensive dress boutique where he bought her a slinky black gown even though she protested, wanting to go home. He insisted then took her back to his place about five and he drugged her again.

Her awareness of the drug came around seven that night when she couldn't keep her hands off of him. Remy had her naked on the sofa at nine when Arlo walked through the door. She was crying because he had pushed her off of the couch when she didn't move and while she hit the sharp corner of the coffee table, he had laughed, shoving her once more into it before hauling her up.

Arlo told Remy to take Astrid home because he was tired of hearing them. So, Remy helped Astrid dress, took her home where he made love to her, whispering sweet promises and she passed out before he had even pulled out.

He left a letter on her bedside table.

A love note.

A promise to come back for her.

* * * * * *
Hello fellow readers

This book only becomes darker when Calder, at last, tells Astrid what he knows about Remy's past. I promise you won't want to miss it!

Thank you for your continued support and please feel free to leave comments and suggestions!

Joy M.