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Tricking Astrid (Ch 8.2)

Chapter 8 (Part 2) "Yeah, I just showered but my plans to clean house went away after the shower made me sleepy. Usually, it perks me up." Astrid lied straight to Remy's face. He once more advanced, so she backed up. He purposely did it so they would end up near her bedroom. She was sore and swollen. If Remy found out about Calder she'd never forgive herself for hurting him. "I want you," He stated, grabbing hold of her left wrist, "Now. In bed." Astrid looked frightened as he forced her into the bedroom. He swung her towards the bed, letting her go so she hit the bed frame hard. She glared over at him, "What the hell did you do that for?" Remy began stripping, his eyes glaring right back at her. She swallowed, realizing he KNEW. Somehow, he had known about her recent visit to Calder's. She saw the hateful glint in his eyes. The slight sneer on his lips. Remy wanted to fuck her, knowing Calder had just been with her two hours ago. &…
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Tricking Astrid (Ch 8.1)

Chapter 8 - part 1 Remy loved Astrid. Watching her come out of Calder's condo at 6 AM was the hardest thing he'd ever forced himself to witness. Calder had called her a taxi, the big Douchebag spender. Remy was angry, looking at the taxi fade into the early morning rush hour. He bit his fingernails, wondering if Calder would really leave Astrid alone now that had fucked her. Calder was a lawyer, used to getting his way because of who his family represented. The arrogant asshole would probably try to see her. Calder, like himself, found women like Astrid irresistible. She was incredible in bed as well as a good friend to have. Remy sighed, then got out of his car. The kinks in his back loosened a bit as he walked up to the secured building. C. Lewis #401 C. Lewis #201 Great, two Lewis brothers in one building. If he had to guess, Calder was #401. Chris had a family. He'd want lower evacuation safety. Grinning, Remy returned to his car. He drove the slow and long way toward…

Joke- Monkey business

A guy walks into a bar with his pet monkey. He orders a drink and while he's drinking, the monkey jumps all around the place. The monkey grabs some olives off of the bar and eats them. Then grabs some sliced limes and eats them. Then jumps onto the pool table, grabs one of the billiard balls, sticks it in his mouth, and to everyone's amazement, somehow swallows it whole. 
The bartender screams at the guy, "Did you see what your monkey just did?"
The guy says, "No, what?"
"He just ate the cue ball off my pool table whole!"
"Yeah, that doesn't surprise me," replies the guy, "He eats everything in sight, the little bastard. Sorry. I'll pay for the cue ball and stuff." He finishes his drink, pays his bill, pays for the stuff the monkey ate, then leaves.
Two weeks later he's in the bar again and has his monkey with him. He orders a drink and the monkey starts running around the bar again. While the man is finishing his drink,…

Hey God

https://jukebaritone.bandcamp.com/track/hey-god


I know this guy, he comes here
From time to time, he buys a beer
And I don’t know why, he comes here
I suppose he’s got problems or something he wants to disappear
He hates his life, he hates his job
He hates his wife, he even hates his dog!
And I don’t know why, he hates his dog
Maybe he’s dyslexic or something and got it mixed up with God!
He hates everything, that he has become
He hates everything, that he hasn’t done
And now I know why, he comes here
He don’t say nothing man, he shouts it loud and clear!


He says,
Hey God! Don’t you worry about me
I’m doing fine without your generosity
You get such a kick, out of my tragedy
I forgot about you so don’t you worry…
About me


I know this girl, she works here
She’s always high, but her mind stays clear
And I don’t know why, she’s working here
You know she’s got a degree in economics or something?
She’s getting it out, for two bucks a pop
The old men gather around, and stare at her lot
And I don’t know why, she work…

Cooking for two

Cooking for two Making dinner seemed so easy  until your drunk eyes followed my mistakes and suddenly we should have been on a reality TV show because you fell on my sharp knife while I cried WHYYYY?
Joy4no1

Chester and the 24-hour lottery (Ch 19)

Chapter 19; Winter F'd-Land It snowed. Chester kept his arms down although he wanted to wrap them around his body like the women had when stepping out onto the mountainside where over fifty people meandered. When he exhaled in a huff of confusion at the activity, his breath rose like a dragon's and the cold air stung his lungs. "Holy hell it's cold!" Van exclaimed looking around, "Come on Chet, let's find out why no one bothered to say we needed a jacket and take theirs." He fought a grin, imagining taking clothes off of bewildered people's backs, "How about we find Saldivar first?" "Follow me," Henry strode to the left expecting others to follow. Chester assessed the direction, noting a crowd but looked the other way and caught sight of a white bun and took off by himself. He didn't have to follow anyone anymore, least of all men like Henry. "Oh, Chester!" Potter smiled when he caught her attention, …

Flobots - Handlebars

This is the song I finished writing Chester and the 24-hour lottery too. Another book finished. First of many coming in 2018!