Mrs. Betty Crocker is going to jail
Her chocolate brownie cake mix is looking mighty stale
Good ladies of the city are having a bake sale
Raising necessary dough for Betty Crocker's bail
Her goose is cooked and her fish is fried
Her bread got burned by the fireside
Her jam won't set and her buns won't rise
They'be been tied in knots from telling little white lies
Tied them with red bribbons to make sweet alibis
She's been making gravy out of store-bought stock
Got the butcher's wife in a state of shock
Oh, Mrs. Betty Crocker, where is your head?
Putting bacon grease in the gingerbread
Your neighbor said that you've been stealing things
So you tied her up with your apron strings
Mrs. Betty Crocker what ya gonna do?
Old Uncle Ben has been telling on you
What ya gonna do? Make a big old batch of jailbird stew
Now Mrs. Betty Crocker is out of jail, and boy oh boy, has she got a tale to tell
But she won't be cooking, she don't give a damn
Cause she's gonna run away from the Gingerbread Man.